This is my 1 year anniversary back home in New Orleans. On one hand it seems like time has whizzed by but then on the other hand it seem like it was just yesterday.
I am glad I allowed myself the 1st year to acclimatized & adjust to all the changes since 2005.
How little I knew it was really going to be a course of wisdom to do just that to give a year in adjusting.
I do not regret coming home and truly look forward now to be more of a participant. Without a doubt it has been scary at times. Nothing to do with the city, but all of us being tossed around because of the recession.
If I had to rate the year I would give it a strong B.
Several things that I was bound & intent to care for were done though sometimes with bated breath. I look and pray for in this second year to see some quantum leaps forward, to get myself integrated back into the arts community producing work (and shall I dare?) actually be able to begin providing for myself independently.
What I truly need at this juncture is a modest start-up dollars. All funds are exhausted and because of all the medical issues nothing is coming in. I know it is that way for many, but I am only 1 person and now things are at a critical mass. If I don't do something and do it soon, well the alternatives are unimaginable.
There is always a way out of "no way". I just have to find it. I was to receive an endowment in November & just had the rug pulled out from under me. It is not cancelled just redirected into mid 2011, but that will not help me now.
One good thing is I do not spend money I do not have nor have expectations until it is in hand. Too many times in the past I like many artists have people make offers and then pull out.
Unless I have a retainer or the full amount, I do not put hope in empty offers, so while disappointed I am not devastated.
So on to the next day. And the next and the next.
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